Why Work-Life Balance Isn't the Best Solution

Work-life balance has become a bit of a buzz phrase, especially among mompreneurs. An ideal that is often sought after and discussed as missing from our lives. Seeking to find a balance between competing desires and responsibilities personally and professionally can be daunting.

A start of a new year often means New Year’s resolutions. A strong desire for work-life balance is evident in the many blogs on the subject. More exercise or improving fitness, pursuing a career ambition, taking up a new hobby, and spending more time with family are frequently among the most popular resolutions—all are aspects of daily life. And all of these pursuits are driven by the desire to have time for everything important to us.

Two employees working during COVID

We are constantly chasing the next idea to balance seemingly competing priorities. For women who are working mothers or mompreneurs, there are additional considerations. Many women are navigating the added priorities (and stresses) of raising children, carrying the bulk of daily household responsibilities, in addition to trying to carve time for self-care and a career.

Historically, employers have viewed work as separate from the rest of our lives. The COVID pandemic's impact on our lifestyles has further blurred the already fading lines of distinction between work and life. With more people working from home than ever before and children home for online schooling, work and the rest of life are intertwined now more than ever.

What Is Work-Life Balance?

Work-life balance is defined as the equilibrium between personal life and career work. Equilibrium is a state in which opposing forces or influences are balanced. However, work and “the rest of life” aren’t separate entities that require equal weight. They are parts of the whole that make up our lives.

Do we really seek to “balance” the amount of time and effort that we put into every area equally? Or are we seeking a way to create fulfillment in all areas of life?
Keeping score and making sure the scales are equal make our lives sound more like an equation than a delicate dance of finding what works for us to feel fulfilled.

Viewing all aspects in relationship to each other and integrating the parts to work together is key in feeling fulfilled.

Related Reading: Values and Work-Life Balance: What Is Most Important?

Integrating Work as Part of Life

The goal and the ultimate balance are to work with goals, activities, or other events in your family and social life. It is creating fluidity and integration of all parts that are both cohesive and responsive. A harmonious relationship that doesn’t require equal attention to any individual facet or viewing work and life separately.

Thinking of work as a part of life versus separate from life creates a sense of wholeness and flow instead of a feeling of competition among life’s elements. Approaching balance with the goal of synergy between all areas of your life (work, home, family, community, personal interests, and your well-being) is much more holistic.

“You will never feel truly satisfied by work until you are satisfied by life.”
~Heather Schuck, The Working Mom Manifesto

A mompreneur finds work-life balance working at home

3 Tips to Integrate Work-Life Balance for All Parts of Your Life

Integrating all aspects of your life and seeing them all as parts of a whole can help make clearer decisions and allow you to honor commitments. Other benefits: less stress, more rest, and improved overall health from more ease versus rigidity and competition. Working more or less is not specifically the goal. The goal is to understand our needs and shift daily work habits and patterns to support our well-being while also achieving career aspirations or fulfilling work requirements on the job.

1  Planning is crucial

A plan should be firm, yet flexible. Lists, calendars, and a master schedule showing ALL responsibilities and priorities help us integrate the parts into the whole. Use whatever works best for you and your family to plan and prioritize together. Seek to understand what structure is needed to feel fulfilled. The goal is not to control time but to understand and structure how you use time and make it work for you and your business. Reevaluate your plan regularly to make necessary adjustments. The more complex your life, such as being a step-parent in a blended family, the more critical planning and reevaluation is.

Related Reading: Why Time Management for Moms Is a Myth


2  Be Present to One Aspect of Life at a Time

Being present means consciously being in the moment and giving that moment your full attention. If we are multi-tasking, moving quickly from one task to another, or our mind is somewhere different from our body, we are not present. If we are playing with our kids but thinking about a report that is due or creating a dinner plan in our head while we are in a business meeting, we are not present to the people and environment around us, or even our own feelings. Being present shows that we value a person or task and allows us to experience those moments fully.

3  Let Go of Expectations

The reality of not meeting our expectations can be a source of pain. Expecting to get it right, not disappoint anyone, or suddenly have an amazing flow to your day continually is unrealistic. Life is dynamic. Needs will shift and change. Adapting and moving with changing needs and priorities is essential to living a whole and harmonious life.

Related Reading: Life's Porcupines and Resiliency: Adapting to the Unexpected

Work-life balance isn’t about balance at all.

Our individual values, priorities, and rhythms determine what is best for our ourselves and family. Understanding how to create and work within a structure that allows all parts of life to be fulfilling takes effort and resilience. Change is a constant. Learning to work and live your life within constant change is a lifelong process.

Have you found yourself getting caught up in the pursuit of balance in your life? Need help in crafting ease, fulfillment, and fluidity? Heartmanity is here to support you along the way. Try our complimentary Discovery Session to see how we can best support you and your goals.

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Christina Maxwell / Heartmanity ContributorChristina Maxwell / Heartmanity Contributor
Christina has a B.S. in Business Administration and two decades of management experience across multiple industries. First introduced to Heartmanity as a coaching client in 2013, she quickly fell in love with the work. After experiencing significant transformation in all areas of her life, she became deeply committed to the Heartmanity mission. Christina brings tremendous expertise and is an invaluable asset to support the growing demand for Heartmanity’s business and coaching programs. Another passion of Christina's is helping couples navigate engagements, intentional wedding planning, and wedding ceremonies. She is Heartmanity's resident ordained minister.

Posted in Business and Leadership

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