Heartmanity's Blog

We are all too familiar with the blame game. When we’re upset or exasperated in life, blaming our spouse, child, friend, or boss is an easy route to relief. You know the drill: “If you wouldn’t procrastinate fixing things around the house, then I wouldn’t nag.” Or if you weren’t so sensitive, we could discuss things calmer.” And sometimes a person moves to name-calling: “You’re so frustrating or selfish or hurtful or ….” In the moment, we feel a release of pent-up energy and uncomfortable emotions. But the thing is, I’ve never heard anyone say they enjoy being blamed or that they liked [...]

I once saw a bumper sticker that said, “We are all connected.” Such a simple phrase, yet with so much more depth than just those four words. This year more than ever, “we are all connected” is a reminder that in a time of great unrest and disruption, our actions and words have far-reaching and lasting effects on those around us. Our world is more culturally diverse than ever, which calls for greater responsibility to tolerate others. Therefore, empathy, acceptance of diversity, and the ability to treat others with respect and dignity are crucial. All skills that can be learned.

Diversity [...]

Is the concept of minimalism a limiting framework? To me, minimalism appeared simply to be the denial of our desires. Since our brains are built on the premise of more, better, and always transcending yesterday, the concept seemed like a trendy girdle to hold back the grand expressions of self-expression. At the very least, I viewed a minimalist life as boring because of my love affair with abundance, flow, variety, and beauty.

The role of a boss comes with great responsibility. Along with responsibility also comes many assumptions and expectations—one of which is that bosses have high skills because of their role. However, employees answer to their boss, a manager, or supervisor, based on their role, not their skills. Another assumption is that just because a person is a boss that they are also leaders, which is not necessarily true. Leadership requires many skill sets and an authentic way of moving and leading. It’s not just a title. And when skill differences vary dramatically in the workplace between [...]

Whether you are aware of it or not, unmanaged emotions often hijack your energy and behavior, causing a distorted view of life's experiences. And our knee-jerk reactions rarely give us good results. Understanding what's happening in our brains can pave the way for calmer responses. The limbic brain (sometimes considered the emotional brain) and the brain stem, (called the survival brain), can quickly override rational thinking. Logic goes out the window instantly when we are feeling threatened emotionally.

Emotional regulation is crucial for today's unrest and ongoing challenges. Learning [...]

Note: In this post, when we talk about "safety," we're referring to emotional safety. If someone's anger makes you feel physically unsafe, contact the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233.

What do you do when someone takes their anger out on you? How do you handle angry people? And why do people get angry in the first place?

It's natural to have lots of questions when faced with anger, but often what we're searching for isn't answers—it's safety. Anger threatens our sense of emotional security, leaving us feeling uncertain about our relationships with others.

COVID-19 has taken the world under its grip. The pandemic has caused ongoing unrest, so anxiousness and worry are natural reactions. And yet, social distancing, wearing masks, and the ongoing quarantines are the new normal. However, if you do your research, you can find ways to support your health. One such method is by utilizing nature’s healing remedies through essential oils.

Research shows that open communication is the best predictor of relationship satisfaction. But when you're rushing to work, working a full day, picking the kids up from school, then off to soccer practice, who has time for a meaningful conversation? Our schedules can be relentless!

An open, honest conversation about your relationship might feel like the last thing you want to do at the end of a long day. And when you do sit down to talk with your partner, you might find yourself nodding and saying "uh-huh" more than staying present. Although a half-hearted response is understandable, it [...]

Being your own boss and running your own business is a dream for many people, but it also comes with a lot of hard work and long days. As an entrepreneur, you’re often wearing multiple hats and spreading yourself thin. Someone’s got to get the work done, and you will rely on yourself for the most important tasks. Not making the time to take care of yourself, however, will affect your energy levels and how you function throughout the day. Making sure you carve out personal self-care time will lead to better performance and support your mental health.

Self-care has many definitions. Just as people are unique and have different preferences and desires, defining self-care for ourselves is also unique. Self-nurturance is about being aware of our own needs, paying attention to and actively choosing to nurture our needs consistently. It's vital to respond to our ever-changing lives, moment-by-moment, by caring for ourselves. Being our best in all aspects of mind, body, and spirit is crucial to our health and well-being.