How Being Compliant Destroys Marriages

February 15, 2019

One of the most common and precarious habits that I observe in couples and even long-term marriages is the popular behavior of telling your partner what they want to hear rather than what you need, want, think and feel. When we go along with our partner rather than engage on a real and authentic level, it builds a marriage with unsteady stilts that can topple at any time.

Pleasing, people pleasers and compliance are prevalent. So why is this habit so pervasive?

Posted in Love, Marriage, and Relationships

How Principles of Ecology Apply to Personal Relationships

February 10, 2019

Did you know that nature creates no waste? Last summer, I had to remind myself of this fact when I came across a magpie greedily devouring a carcase while on a walk.

Think about the magnitude of the concept of "no waste" for a moment. Profound isn't it? Even mind boggling.

It turns out that health for an ecosystem, including our relationship with ourselves,  boils down to a few age-old principles. If we're going to create and keep anything healthy, we have to take care of it!

Posted in Love, Marriage, and Relationships, Our Heartmanity Online Webinars, Friendships and Community

Teens and Screens: Why Won’t My Teen Get Off the Screen?

February 07, 2019

Dopamine-Seeking Reward Loops. That’s why! Of course, it isn’t that simple—we can’t give the entire rap to Dopamine Seeking Reward Loops. There are plenty of other factors why teens get hooked: fulfilling emotional needs, boredom, lack of self-restraint, connection with friends, to name a few. Here we’re going to explore how dopamine affects teens and their developing brains. For the sake of ease, we’re going to shorten to the culprit to Dopamine Loops.

Posted in Perfectly Imperfect Parenting

Get Motivated!  7 Ways to Overcome Procrastination

February 05, 2019

Let’s first get this out of the way—life in modern times is demanding, no matter where you are in your life and career. The escalating demands on our time and attention are astronomical. If you thought that it was only you feeling frazzled, it’s not! All of us need to mindfully keep ourselves encouraged and learn to stay motivated in purposeful action, not just get busier.Regardless of your circumstances, you’ll want to replenish your supply of motivation as often as you need it. Whether you wish to get your life on track, stay on top of procrastination, or find an ideal life-work balance, [...]

Posted in Emotional Intelligence & Fitness

Is Your Business Robbing You of Work-Life Balance?

January 29, 2019

Do you ever feel like your business is running you instead of the other way around? Have you ever wondered how to find balance between work and home? Do you find yourself swinging between burned-out and completely energized and passionate?

One of the things I’ve heard from many business owners over the years is their desire for work/life balance and their search for the secret to achieving balance once and for all. However, balance doesn’t come from outside us.

Posted in Business and Leadership

Do You Want a Happy Marriage? Do These 5 Actions!

January 24, 2019

As I ponder this past year and look forward to new beginnings, one thing is top of mind: my relationships. A ritual I never miss at the beginning of each new year is taking stock of how well I have loved those most important to me the year before. One of the most precious people in my life, as you might guess, is my husband of nearly 40 years. Reflecting on what has supported our happiness and success, there are a few things that stand out, which occurred to me might be helpful to others.

Over the years, I’ve worked with scores of struggling couples. When I ask them if they reserve time [...]

Posted in Love, Marriage, and Relationships

What’s All the Fuss about Self-Care?

January 21, 2019

Recently, I was having a really rough time functioning. I was struggling due to higher than normal family conflict, work stress, and sleep deprivation. We even missed paying some bills, which is so unusual. I wasn’t drinking water or eating nutritious food, and I was certainly not getting any exercise, which I love.  

At some point during this tough time, I ran into a friend who is a mental health professional, and after I vented a bit, she said, “You need to do something for you today.”

I thought, “Hmmm, she’s talking about self-care, but WHAT exactly does that even mean to me right now, [...]

Posted in Habits for Health

You Create the Quality of Your Relationship

January 13, 2019
My friends all know that I would rather go without eating than eat fast food. It's not that an occasional meal at Burger King is going to give you anything but indigestion, but if you make a habit of it, your health and quality of life can decline rapidly.

Relationship works that way, too. Are you looking for a drive-through experience, or a rich, meaningful relationship to savor?

Posted in Love, Marriage, and Relationships

Why It's Critical to Understand Your Child's Temperament

December 29, 2018

Temperament is one of the most underestimated influences in a child’s life. Many times, a difficult temperament trait in a child can be the primary driving force of misbehavior in children. Much of the challenges in child raising often lead back to temperament qualities, such as low adaption or high emotional intensity.

Temperament is a lot like looking into a kaleidoscope. Children's temperament traits come in a multitude of colors and designs along with countless hues and intensities. Turn the dial of a kaleidoscope slightly and everything dramatically changes. So it is with temperament. [...]

Posted in Perfectly Imperfect Parenting

The Business Strategy of Saying “No”

December 17, 2018

One of the greatest challenges of business is knowing when not to follow an idea. A mistake many business owners make—even large companies—is trying to do too much at one time.

When was the last time as a business owner or executive, you were able to follow an initiative through to its completion without at least a few of the following challenges?
  • new ventures devouring too much time and money initiatives and projects screaming for attention a million little things taking you off track pet projects that you clung to for far too long
  • too many great ideas competing for funds
  • going too many [...]

Posted in Business and Leadership