You're probably familiar with the popular book, Don't Sweat the Small Stuff.Great little tips for life, letting go of the little things that annoy us or add to our stress.

However, when it comes to love and relationship, this advice doesn't hold up!

Read on if you want to know why.

Estimated reading time: 4 minutes (much longer to practice and master)

Emotional literacy and emotional intelligence both start by being able to say no. “No” is one of the shortest and simplest of words in almost any language, yet many people, especially people pleasers, have difficulty saying it.

Often, parents come to me because their child has been using that little, powerful word too much. Why do we train it out of them? By the time we’re adults, many of us have learned that it’s easier to go along with others. We seek to please, to be liked, to avoid hurting someone’s feelings, or to prevent conflict. So we say yes when we mean no. Or we say yes but drag [...]

A few months back, I went into The Flooring Place to get my Douglas Honeycomb shades repaired. As I waited to speak to a clerk, I saw an ad about flooring that read: Water resistant. Worry relief. This ad illustrated a simple principle: prevention.

Empathy is prevention. Empathy creates relief from emotional duress and upset. When a person truly listens and understands us, we feel heard, and emotions dissipate. Upset is no match for empathy. Feeling heard is a human need, and an empathetic response goes to the core of this need. And it's why empathy is important in parenting and in a child's [...]

Is a thriving team one that is profitable and productive? Or is it one where everyone is friends? Ask 100 people, and you might get 100 different answers.

The popular show “The Office” exemplifies this discrepancy well. Michael Scott, manager of the Scranton branch of fictional Dunder Mifflin, figured that as long as his team was laughing, they were thriving. But what determines whether or not a team is thriving?Estimated reading time: 6 minutes

Have you ever felt the tang of saying yes when you really wanted to say no? Common responses of people pleasers go something like this: "Sure, I'd be happy to watch your dog for the weekend." "Absolutely, you can count on me for that fundraiser." "No problem—I'll help decorate the kids' lockers for the big game!" "Sure, I'll help you finish that project and stay at the office until it's done!"

It's so easy to say yes, isn't it? Before we even think about our own needs, agreement, and caring responses slide off our tongues.

Estimated reading time: 4 minutes

How would your life be different if you could have regular support, deep connection, and inspiration that you could count on?

Life without love and friendship is empty. Work without support, collaboration, and a shared vision makes for a lonely path. As human beings, we are wired for relationship, and connecting is crucial. Families, businesses, and communities disintegrate without genuine connection. Happier living requires a connection with oneself and each other!

Estimated reading time: 4 minutes

Every summer, my little family of four heads travels to the family cottages in Northern Michigan. Once there, we meet up with three generations of cousins, two sets of grandparents, and a multitude of friends. The friends’ cottages are also full of multiple generations across their family trees. Intergenerational living in cottages is a lot of fun, but it can also have its share of challenges.

What does this have to do with you? Intergenerational living is subject to a long list of struggles—and joys—that others don’t have. But at the heart of this complex dynamic, the challenges are the [...]

Emotions. They can get the best of us, sometimes triggering primitive, short-sighted, and impulsive actions. Yet, unlike animals, humans have the ability to express and choose their emotions, as well as anticipate how other people will respond. Our emotional nature can be confusing and overwhelming, with many conflicting emotions swirling simultaneously; therefore, emotional regulation is key.

When regulated, emotions provide us with important information. If we approach them with a curious and accepting attitude, they can be used to avert danger, solve problems, and bring us comfort. [...]

When the Great Recession hit, an acquaintance was working for a large company that, like many companies, laid off employees to remain profitable. However, an unusual thing happened in his particular department—instead of clinging to their jobs, employees jumped ship (and had been for years)!

These employees surrendered good pay and great benefits rather than stick around under a micromanager. He was impossible to please, didn’t provide adequate direction for projects, and criticized all ideas before turning around and presenting employees’ ideas as his own. Ultimately, his department was [...]