It’s common to hear couples complain about behaviors of their partners while wishing their life could be happier. Somehow, we think that if our partner changed, we would be happier. Or we think, “If my partner would stop annoying me, start appreciating me, or be more intimate with me, our relationship would improve.” However, the key lies in our ability to love ourselves.

Estimated reading time: 4 minutes

Blurred family boundaries have repercussions. At best, they can be annoying; at worst, they’re completely soul-crushing. We’ve all seen examples: siblings who constantly bicker, helicopter parenting, in-laws stopping by unannounced, and grandparents who try to dictate how to parent. Difficult family members definitely can be challenging!

Setting healthy boundaries, on the other hand, creates dynamic, thriving relationships where both parties can be genuine and grow together. That’s the ideal, and it is not always—hardly ever—easy to achieve. Establishing limits in family life is worth the [...]

We have been duped! “Happily ever after” has been made out to be something that happens magically when you’re in love. People don’t tell you how much work it takes to understand one another in everyday life.

Love is a choice and one that isn't always easy. It can be difficult to set aside your own opinions and truly hear your partner’s opposing views.

No one prepares you with the necessary skills, such as how to express emotions without hurting your partner or how to calm your emotions so they don’t distort reality and blind you when communicating with your partner.

Estimated reading time: 3 [...]

Most of us (especially parents) know what to do if our clothes catch fire: STOP, DROP, and ROLL. But do we know what to do if our relationship catches fire?

Our relationship may function smoothly and harmoniously most of the time. But when a conflict does arise, we may find out that we just don’t know how to resolve it. Many times, the problem lies in our lack of communication skills.

We all want to feel heard and understood. If we don’t know how to establish real connection through effective communication in our love relationship, we may find ourselves competing within the relationship for [...]

It sounds impossible, right? After all, it takes two to tango. How can one person transform a relationship without the other one on board?Well, it does take two to tango, but if one dancer knows exactly what they're doing and practices often, he/she can teach their partner how to be a better dancer without them even knowing it. It may sound a little sly and tricky, but in some cases, it's just what a couple needs to make the shift from bitterness to bliss.

Estimated reading time: 3 minutes

You can almost feel it in the air—just a little extra tension to go along with the holiday spirit. Or maybe more than a little. It’s tempting to focus on just getting things done, but if you do that, a couple of weeks from now you may notice your relationship with your spouse becoming a bit frazzled.

Even under the best of circumstances, living your love actively for your spouse every day can be challenging. There’s so much competing for your attention: work, family, chores, errands, and shopping . . . on and on the list goes! It can be hard to hang on to that special love that brought you [...]

Complaining is one way the brain lets off steam, but when done too frequently as a couple, it is disheartening and can become a pattern that diminishes the vitality of a relationship. A couple’s complaints can eclipse their love, corrode joy, and make married couples begin to doubt why they even married each other. If that's you, you're likely feeling unfulfilled in marriage or in a relationship, so keep reading.

We may have hard heads but we don’t have rock-solid hearts—our hearts are soft and vulnerable. In committed relationships, we need a lot of understanding to build bridges, especially when our needs collide with our partner’s.

One of the things we tend to do is personalize our partner’s behavior when they are acting out their stress or unresolved emotions. When we personalize their behavior, our feelings often get hurt—and then we sometimes either lash out or disconnect from our partner to protect ourselves. Neither tactic creates more closeness or love in our relationship.

In today's hectic world, if we aren’t mindful, it doesn't take long for two people in a loving relationship to unknowingly let outer pressures override quality time together. It’s easy to get caught up in daily demands so much that we can even begin to feel that our partner is the problem, or at least they’re a hassle. And just as easy, is to "fall out of love."

A client once said to me, “I feel like I’m bleeding to death from a million tiny cuts.”

As a couple, we can fall into an antagonistic relationship habit without even realizing it, such as continually digging up the past or neglecting to dedicate quality time to the relationship. We begin doing the very things that damage a strong and healthy relationship. Sometimes, even small, annoying relationship habits begin to create static and strife, replacing true connection.

Estimated reading time: 6 minutes