Step 1 of Building Healthy Brain Habits: Dream Big, Start Small

April 03, 2017

This Spring, we are bringing you a different take on Spring Cleaning. Why not apply the age-old, domestic practice to your life in a new way? Cleaning old habits out of your brain is more likely to improve your life than mopping.

Posted in Brain Fitness, Mindfulness and Perspective, Emotional Intelligence & Fitness, Most Popular

Compliance: A Felony Against Self

March 09, 2013

"Sure, I'd be happy to babysit your kids." "Absolutely, you can count on me for that committee." "No problem—I'll finish this project if I have to stay at the office till midnight!"

We are creatures wired for relationship. Before we even think, agreement and caring responses slide off our tongues. Growing up, many of us learned that the safest and fastest way to be liked and to belong was to comply. We just couldn't say no because we loved seeing others happy. We discovered that we could make friends, avoid conflict, and dodge rejection through compliance. The relief by avoiding conflict [...]

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Anger Gets a Bad Rap

October 02, 2012
I've yet to meet anyone who truly likes anger. Most people dodge it, dump it, judge it, repress it, disown it, cloak it, reject it, and/or apologize for it. And many people are afraid of anger, so they try their best to avoid making anyone else angry. Anger really does get a bad rap. Why is that? Why do we dislike anger so much? Could it be that we have spent so much time running from anger and labeling it as bad that we have forgotten to seek to understand it? Perhaps we never learned—or we've forgotten—that anger is a vital energy that just needs to be directed. Anger has a wisdom of [...]

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Stop Forgiving People!

September 21, 2012
"Forgiveness" is a term used so often that few question its intrinsic value. You'd probably agree that asking for and offering forgiveness has become common practice. Just like many others, I was taught growing up that when you hurt someone—even accidentally—the right thing to do is to say you're sorry and ask for forgiveness. As children, we learn quickly when an apology is expected, even if we were totally innocent or at the very least unconscious in our action. Contrary to everything I've read and everything that I have been taught, I have begun to question whether forgiveness is ever [...]

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"My Kids Are Driving Me Crazy!"

November 08, 2011
Years ago, a mom told me of a time when she was on an important phone call and her three-year-old son kept bugging her. In desperation, she went to the fridge, reached for a jar of jelly, took off the top, and handed it to him. Delighted, he sat gobbling up the entire jar of jelly with his fingers while she finished her call.

Posted in Parents: Permission to Be Imperfect, Most Popular