Conflict. Power Struggles. Arguments. They are relational challenges—and opportunities—for closeness and understanding in a romantic relationship. There's a catch: we need to know how to resolve our differences and deal with a power struggle in a relationship.

A previous client reminded me just how powerful it can be when we identify the roots of our relationship issues. We hadn’t worked together for years, but when I ran into her, she told me that a one-liner I gave her from a coaching session had totally changed her life. Maybe the insight will help you, too.

Estimated reading time: 4 [...]

In the first few years of my marriage, resentment was a frequent companion. It bubbled up so often that one day, I committed to explore why and set a goal to reach ZERO resentment. Ambitious, I know.

Fast forward to today. As a veteran in teaching emotional intelligence and having coached hundreds of couples over the years, I’ve discovered why relationship resentment is such a common splinter. However, what most people don’t recognize is the personal responsibility that is required to live resentment-free.

Estimated reading time: 5 minutes

Navigating the ebb and flow of relationships isn't always smooth sailing, is it!? It's like we're on the ocean in a tiny vessel; sometimes the sea is calm, and at other times, storms hit, rocking our boat. And occasionally, our "relationship boat" fills with water as it careens from side to side in the storm. It can even feel like the relationship is sinking.

Conflicts can be the most daunting for a couple, yet, they also hold the potential for major growth AND to bring us closer. That is if we have the tools and EQ skills to weather the storms.

Estimated reading time: 4 minutes.

When my husband and I were first married, I was anything but pleasant whenever he called me during a workday. Interrupting my focus irritated me until I realized that in relationships and parenting, interruptions are opportunities for loving connection!

I was reminded of this bedrock of our relationship last week when my husband left the following phone message: “My heart is broken that I missed your call!” (So if you call me and get a full mailbox, it’s likely filled with my husband’s love messages saved for replaying.) The week before, he told me that his heart flutters every time he sees [...]

When landscaping a yard and garden, we rarely plant randomly. Often, we hire an expert to draw up a design, or we spend considerable time planning and choosing flowers and bushes perfect for the soil, moisture, and light in the area. Having a blueprint helps us create a beautiful, low-maintenance garden and yard. Then we take plenty of time to prepare the soil with compost, manure, peat moss, and sand to get just the right consistency.  But do we take this same care for our relationships?

Estimated reading time: 4.5 minutes

Whether you have kids or not, in any household, what you DO have is an abundance of jobs that need to be done regularly. Someone’s got to be the janitor who sweeps up, the family banker, pet feeder, entertainment coordinator, grocery shopper.... the list goes on and on. And if you are parents, someone must spearhead the parenting division by planning daycare, school lunches, parent-teacher conferences, sporting events, and summer camps.

Wow, there's a TON to track and complete! Marriage conflict seems inevitable when you say it out loud.

Estimated reading: 4 minutes

Research shows that open communication is the best predictor of relationship satisfaction. But when you're rushing to work, working a full day, picking the kids up from school, then off to soccer practice, who has time for a meaningful conversation? Our schedules can be relentless!

An open, honest conversation about your relationship might feel like the last thing you want to do at the end of a long day. And when you finally sit down to talk with your partner, you might find yourself nodding and saying "uh-huh" more than staying present. Although a half-hearted response is understandable, it [...]

In love and marriage, we're all a bit like magnets. Ever notice how sometimes we're pulled together irresistibly by an invisible force, and other times, we're pushing each other away? That's where emotional intelligence, or EQ, comes into play. It's our superpower in relationships. Think of it as your go-to tool for navigating life’s ups and downs together.

Love acts like a magnet, drawing us together and holding us close. Yet, as we all know, keeping that magnetism strong requires much more than just attraction. It's about nurturing understanding, fostering open communication, and learning [...]

Contrary to what you might feel, it’s not too late to save your relationship!

If you're struggling in your relationship, it might be too big of a stretch to remember that honeymoon feeling. Those blissful feelings are often mowed over by conflicts, complaining, and disagreements. Many couples don’t understand why the strife continues and often feel helpless to stop the vicious cycle. So, unfortunately, they keep digging the hole deeper, having the same arguments over and over.

Some wonder, “Have I fallen out of love?” or "Why am I failing at love?" Others wonder if they're the only ones with [...]

It's been said that relationships are the hardest yoga. I agree that relationships take the same focus, effort, and flexibility.

In marriage and other romantic relationships, as in yoga, we salute the sun each day, seeking to honor the best in ourselves, our partner, and our lives together. We bend by adapting to life's unexpected curveballs; we twist when we wrestle with conflict; and we stretch by striving to love our partner even when it's not always easy. And when we seek poise between autonomy and intimacy, it can be as challenging as a one-armed side plank.

Estimated reading time: 4.5 [...]