Do We Need to Experience Love to Be Loving?

May 09, 2019

"Forgiveness" is a term used so often that few people question its intrinsic value. You'd probably agree that asking for and offering forgiveness has become common practice. Just like many others, I was taught growing up that when you hurt someone—even accidentally—the right thing to do is to say you're sorry and ask for forgiveness. Children quickly learn when adults expect an apology, even when a child may have lacked the skill to respond differently.

Many may be surprised for me to question the long and treasured tradition of forgiveness and how we view love in the context of forgiving [...]

Posted in Emotional Intelligence & Fitness, Most Popular

Give Yourself Permission to Feel to Cultivate Inner Freedom

April 14, 2019

Recently, I've been facilitating a women's group, and the group has reminded me of how difficult it can be for people to allow themselves to feel. Emotions can be so overwhelming, especially the heavier feelings, but with practice it can be a great resource to happiness. Give yourself permission to feel. Give yourself permission to be happy everyday.

One of the hardest challenges for a person is to be burdened by a stockpile of unpleasant, charged emotions—but instead of feeling them, the person judges them, censors them, beats himself or herself up over even having them, and dutifully [...]

Posted in Emotional Intelligence & Fitness

Tired of Being Overweight? Lose Weight with a New Viewpoint on an Old Problem

March 05, 2019

Are you struggling to get motivated and unable to lose weight? Does it feel like you’ve tried everything with no results?! It is discouraging at best.

You’re not alone. It’s difficult for many people, including myself, to stay dedicated to a lifestyle that promotes health and fitness. Our schedules are crazy busy, and it takes discipline and consistency to develop habits. But is that all that’s going on?

Posted in Emotional Intelligence & Fitness

Get Motivated!  7 Ways to Overcome Procrastination

February 05, 2019

Let’s first get this out of the way—life in modern times is demanding, no matter where you are in your life and career. The escalating demands on our time and attention are astronomical. If you thought that it was only you feeling frazzled, it’s not! All of us need to mindfully keep ourselves encouraged and learn to stay motivated in purposeful action, not just get busier.Regardless of your circumstances, you’ll want to replenish your supply of motivation as often as you need it. Whether you wish to get your life on track, stay on top of procrastination, or find an ideal life-work balance, [...]

Posted in Emotional Intelligence & Fitness

What’s All the Fuss about Self-Care?

January 21, 2019

Recently, I was having a really rough time functioning. I was struggling due to higher than normal family conflict, work stress, and sleep deprivation. We even missed paying some bills, which is so unusual. I wasn’t drinking water or eating nutritious food, and I was certainly not getting any exercise, which I love.  

At some point during this tough time, I ran into a friend who is a mental health professional, and after I vented a bit, she said, “You need to do something for you today.”

I thought, “Hmmm, she’s talking about self-care, but WHAT exactly does that even mean to me right now, [...]

Posted in Emotional Intelligence & Fitness

Empathy Is the Antidote for Apathy and Indifference

November 27, 2018

Whether it's a friend, spouse, or a co-worker, the unknown of another's emotions can make us very uneasy even if we desire to support the person. Sometimes it's just easier to remain on our own island and ensure safety and predictability. Empathy bridges that gap.

Do you steer away from those "soft" feelings because they might take you places you are unprepared to go? Do others’ reactions and charged emotions make you uncomfortable? Are you concerned that you'll be sucked into an abyss of someone else's pain? After all, some days you might be barely dealing with life's challenges.

At a [...]

Posted in Emotional Intelligence & Fitness

How Emotional Resilience Can Help You Cultivate Happiness

November 01, 2018

For many, stress continues to build until a hair-trigger is released by an unexpected letdown. Changes in plans or inconveniences are met with impatience and emotional over-reactions. Sometimes another's negative mood or criticism can ruin entire days.

The antidote to this inner turmoil is emotional resilience, an element of emotional intelligence that allows one to adapt to and recover from stress and negativity more easily. The good news is that you can actively improve your emotional resilience and noticeably increase your happiness.

Posted in Emotional Intelligence & Fitness

Why You Should Stop Being a People Pleaser

October 23, 2018

Today there are many definitions of people pleasing. What would be your people pleaser definition? Mine is giving up oneself for another without their knowledge. We so often mistake selflessness for unconditional love. However, is a person truly being loving without first loving their self? If you love to get love or you're kind to avoid rejection is that true kindness?

We are conditioned to believe that good is always good, and kind is always kind. But as I pointed out in my blog, "True Motives for 'Sorry, I Didn't Mean It,'" things aren't always what they seem. Behavior is only an [...]

Posted in Emotional Intelligence & Fitness

Learn to Recognize and Allow Yourself to Feel Your Emotions

September 08, 2018

Getting in touch with one’s feelings is not that easy for most of us. For years, we have been taught to suppress and hide certain feelings. For instance, when we are feeling down and blue, we are often told to put on a “brave face” and smile, even though we know we are hurting inside.

Over time, it can become more difficult to express what we are truly feeling.

Posted in Emotional Intelligence & Fitness

How to Control and Release Anger Without Lashing Out

August 28, 2018

Do you ever lash out in anger? Are you surprised when anger bubbles up and lashes out at a loved one unexpectedly?Everyone gets angry sometimes—and some have an anger problem. Anger is often considered a “negative” or “bad” emotion, which we have been taught to suppress and push aside. After all, if we let anger get the best of us, our reactions can lead to negative consequences or hurt ourselves or others. However, to control anger, one must understand it and learn not just to control angry outbursts but to emotionally regulate emotions so that you can restrain yourself and express it in [...]

Posted in Emotional Intelligence & Fitness