Heartmanity's Blog

Do you find yourself stuck even when you have an important goal? Do you procrastinate and then heap guilt and shame on yourself, making you feel even worse? Perhaps you are backsliding because you can no longer motivate yourself and completely stalled out. What do you do?

The first step toward reaching our goals and overcoming obstacles is understanding how we are motivated.

Estimated reading time: 5 minutes

Can people change? The answer to this question largely depends on your mindset. According to researcher Carol Dweck, our perspective shapes whether we successfully achieve our goals or not.

In her book Mindset: The New Psychology of Success, Dweck identifies two points of view: the growth mindset and the fixed mindset. Her research suggests that whichever of these two categories we fall into largely determines what we can achieve in life.Estimated reading time: 5 minutes

Today there are many definitions of people pleasing. And many say, "They have a pleaser personality." What would be your people pleaser definition? Mine is giving up oneself for another without their knowledge. We so often mistake selflessness for unconditional love. However, is a person truly being loving without first loving their self? If you love to get love or you're kind to avoid rejection is that true kindness?

Estimated reading time: 4.5 minutes

The uncertainty of the last couple of years has increased anxiety across the globe. Never before have we been more connected electronically yet seemingly disconnected from ourselves. Adults and children alike put their attention daily on negative social media feeds and news specials that often intensify this hypertension. Numerous people struggle to maintain a work-life balance while stress, burnout, and substance addictions climb. Thus, inner peace can seem unattainable, yet a calmer self is within your reach.

Estimated reading time: 5 minutes

Adult children of emotionally immature parents are often left feeling like they can't make it on their own or somehow that they're not enough. These same parents are often self-involved, and they give mixed messages to their children growing up about their lovability and individuality. Parents' emotional immaturity denies a child the deep sense of being felt and seen, which hinders a child's budding self-identity.

Estimated reading time: 9 minutes

Do you find yourself only half-listening to a friend or spouse? Do you race to get to your job each morning and sprint to pick up your kids after work? Then rush home to start dinner? And no matter how many things you check off your list, when your head hits the pillow at night, your mind is racing with all the things left undone.

Yes, our lives are very full, sometimes even hectic, so rushing is understandable occasionally. However, if it's a regular occurrence, your stress level is building, and the frantic, frazzled self is becoming a habit. Stress is a reminder of the need for a better [...]

“You may not control all the events that happen to you, but you can decide not to be reduced by them.” Maya Angelou

From everyday challenges to traumatic events with long-term impacts, life comes with difficulties. Resilience is what helps you adapt to these stressful situations. Psychologists define resilience as the process of adapting well in the face of adversity, trauma, tragedy, threats, or significant sources of stress such as family or relationship problems, serious health problems, or workplace and financial stressors. 

When parents are emotionally immature, having a healthy relationship with them can be difficult. No matter how the adult child attempts to be heard or understood, often the parent is unable to truly empathize or connect on a meaningful level.

Below are seven symptoms that can indicate that you are a child of an emotionally immature parent. With each symptom, practical advice is given on how to be true to yourself while also being respectful to your parents.

Estimated reading time: 8 minutes

Anger can be a tough emotion to navigate whether you’re angry at yourself or someone is lashing out in anger at you. It’s natural to want to protect ourselves when someone is reacting in anger. And, of course, self-advocacy and safety are crucial. We don’t ever want to tolerate emotional abuse in any form or in any relationship.

But can we build confidence and learn skills to hold a safe space for angry outbursts? Is it possible to diffuse anger and better love those in our lives?