One thing is top of mind in my life: my relationships. Every year, a ritual I never miss is taking stock of how well I have loved those most important to me the year before. I typically do this practice on my birthday or at the beginning of the new year. One of the most precious people in my life, as you might guess, is my husband of several decades. This year in reflecting on what has supported our happiness and success, there are a few things that stand out, which occurred to me that they may be helpful to others.

Estimated reading time: 10 minutes ... but a lifetime to master!

Have you ever compared the quality of your relationship to a dining experience? Probably not. Yet, most people relish a delicious, home-cooked meal, or a gourmet dinner at a fine restaurant.

It's common knowledge to my family and friends that I would rather go without eating than eat fast food. It's not that I'm a food snob; I simply don't feel good after eating most of its fare. An occasional meal at McDonald's or Burger King isn't going to give you anything but indigestion. Yet, if you make a regular habit of eating fast food, your convenience may go up, but your health can rapidly decline.

In our very active and full lives, it is so easy to get caught up in the daily demands of our work or interests and sacrifice love. With the added challenge of technology addiction, couples can be living more like roommates than lovers. Many struggling couples ask me, "Can you fall out of love?" or tell me that they've fallen out of love.

Estimated reading time: 6 minutes

You are now competing with pixels for the attention of nearly everyone you know. And you are probably losing.

Technology addiction, screen time, the black hole of the internet, Reddit, and the endless scroll of Instagram and TikTok—not to mention those notifications every time an email slides in! The widespread influence of tech is part of our daily lives. There are more ways for screens to suck people in than there are people to be enticed.

Estimated reading time: 4 minutes

It’s common to hear couples complain about behaviors of their partners while wishing their life could be happier. Somehow, we think that if our partner changed, we would be happier. Or we think, “If my partner would stop annoying me, start appreciating me, or be more intimate with me, our relationship would improve.” However, the key lies in our ability to love ourselves.

Estimated reading time: 4 minutes

Not every couple will struggle with glitchy Skype connections during months apart, the U.S. Government interrupting dinner, or the strain Top Secret secrets place on two people in love. Military relationships are subject to a laundry list of struggles—and joys—that others don’t have. But at the heart of military relationship challenges are the same human issues that every couple navigates.

These seven tips for strengthening a military relationship are based on the principles of Emotional Intelligence (EQ). Hopefully they will help with deployment, reunion and the everyday challenges of [...]

We have been duped! “Happily ever after” has been made out to be something that happens magically when you’re in love. People don’t tell you how much work it takes to understand one another in everyday life.

Love is a choice and one that isn't always easy. It can be difficult to set aside your own opinions and truly hear your partner’s opposing views.

No one prepares you with the necessary skills, such as how to express emotions without hurting your partner or how to calm your emotions so they don’t distort reality and blind you when communicating with your partner.

Estimated reading time: 3 [...]

Most of us (especially parents) know what to do if our clothes catch fire: STOP, DROP, and ROLL. But do we know what to do if our relationship catches fire?

Our relationship may function smoothly and harmoniously most of the time. But when a conflict does arise, we may find out that we just don’t know how to resolve it. Many times, the problem lies in our lack of communication skills.

We all want to feel heard and understood. If we don’t know how to establish real connection through effective communication in our love relationship, we may find ourselves competing within the relationship for [...]

It sounds impossible, right? After all, it takes two to tango. How can one person transform a relationship without the other one on board?Well, it does take two to tango, but if one dancer knows exactly what they're doing and practices often, he/she can teach their partner how to be a better dancer without them even knowing it. It may sound a little sly and tricky, but in some cases, it's just what a couple needs to make the shift from bitterness to bliss.

Estimated reading time: 3 minutes