Why Empathy Is Essential to Learn and How to Be Empathetic!

August 24, 2021

Empathy is an essential skill for deepening our connections with others, but most of our attempts at empathy fall into one of three traps: blocking, fixing, or sympathizing.

Our best intentions are not enough to ensure our loved ones feel heard and understood. We need to develop—and master—the ability to empathize and show compassion for others. Developing empathy requires practicing and applying critical emotional intelligence skills to validate and comfort our loved ones in their time of need.

Estimated reading time: 4 minutes

Posted in Emotional Intelligence, How to Build Empathy

How to Apply Emotional, Cognitive, and Compassionate Empathy

March 03, 2021

Empathy is not one-size-fits-all. Different types of empathy are appropriate for different people, relationships, and circumstances.

If you are struggling to express empathy, your problem might not be that you aren't an empathetic person—it could be that you're accessing a type of empathy that doesn't come naturally to you or that the type of empathy you're expressing isn't appropriate for the situation at hand.

Estimated reading time: 6 minutes

Posted in Emotional Intelligence & Fitness, How to Build Empathy

Men and Empathy—Are They a Lost Cause?

June 01, 2020

Empathy and Men vs. Women: A Common Scenario

Recently, a couple came in for marriage coaching because they were stuck in a rut. Whenever she was upset about something, she would seek emotional support from him. Instead of empathy or even reflective listening, he would cut her off and suggest a bevy of ways to solve her problem. She would get more upset as a result because she didn’t feel understood. “Why can’t you just be there for me?” she’d ask.

In our session together, he explained that he felt like he would be validating her “unproductive” behavior (i.e., being emotional without taking [...]

Posted in Emotional Intelligence, How to Build Empathy

Why Everyone Needs Empathy and Self-Compassion—Especially Now!

April 04, 2020

Without exception and across the globe, people’s lives have been changed by the pandemic and the continuing rebound of families and businesses. And everyone is navigating the dramatic increase in the digital world. Just try to keep teens off of their smartphones! Regardless of the challenge, there is one emotional intelligence skill that can make a difference in all relationships—empathy!

Estimated reading time: 4 minutes

Posted in Emotional Intelligence, How to Build Empathy

The 3 Types of Empathy Explained: Part III, Compassionate Empathy

January 09, 2020

The adage, “think with your head, not with your heart,” would make you think that emotional empathy (Part I of this series) and cognitive empathy (Part II of this series) cannot coexist. Luckily, that’s not true! When the heart and mind meet in the middle, the third type of empathy comes alive—Compassionate Empathy.

Compassionate empathy is the antithesis of knee-jerk reactions and it is often the ideal response to challenging situations as this skill blends intellect, emotion, and action by considering the whole person. By developing compassionate empathy, you’ll go beyond a simple [...]

Posted in Emotional Intelligence, How to Build Empathy

The 3 Types of Empathy Explained: Part II, Cognitive Empathy

January 07, 2020

Welcome to the second part of the in-depth series on the types of empathy. In Part 1, you learned about Emotional Empathy. Now, it’s time to explore Cognitive Empathy. In the next blog, we’ll cover Compassionate Empathy.

To begin, think about all the people in your life. Is there someone you turn to when you need a solution to a problem? Someone who can cut through your emotional mess and help you formulate a plan of action?

These go-to problem-solvers often rely on cognitive empathy to make sense of other people’s struggles. Cognitive empathy is a characteristic of emotional intelligence or [...]

Posted in Emotional Intelligence, How to Build Empathy

The 3 Types of Empathy Explained: Part I, Emotional Empathy

January 04, 2020

“Empathy is seeing with the eyes of another, listening with the ears of another and feeling with the heart of another.” ~Alfred Alder

You may have heard Alder’s description of empathy before, but did you know there are three types of empathy? That’s right! There’s Emotional Empathy, Compassionate Empathy, and Cognitive Empathy, and each one has its uses. This series of posts will explore each type of empathy in depth so you can better recognize and utilize them.

Let’s begin with Emotional Empathy. When someone uses the quote above or calls themselves an “empath,” they’re typically referring [...]

Posted in Emotional Intelligence, How to Build Empathy

The Power of Empathy: More than a Band-Aid for the Heart

August 13, 2019
One of the most needed and talked about topics and skills right now is empathy. Why? Because we are all longing for connection. People are hungry to be understood. And empathy has become a lost art. The power of empathy is at the core of emotional intelligence (EQ) and relationship mastery. It faithfully delivers the ability to connect with people we love and care about—and even handle those difficult people in our lives gracefully.

Do you ever feel ill-equipped to respond to a friend, spouse, or co-worker when they're sharing strong feelings or a painful experience? Do you postpone those [...]

Posted in Emotional Intelligence, How to Build Empathy

The Meaning of Empathy and Sympathy—and How to Tell the Difference!

July 18, 2019

You’d be forgiven for mistaking sympathy and empathy for synonyms. Much of pop culture and even many dictionaries confuse the two. On a basic level, they are similar. But in a very meaningful, practical way—empathy and sympathy are two separate practices and distinct emotional responses. We'll identify the difference between empathy and sympathy by exploring their roots and meanings.

Posted in Emotional Intelligence, How to Build Empathy

How to Talk to Someone with Empathy—and What to Avoid!

June 25, 2019

Recently, someone shared the following experience with me that aptly depicts a common occurrence and illustrates a lack of empathy and self-awareness. Perhaps you can relate; it's so easy to find ourselves unprepared in real-life situations.

Here's what she shared with me: "During a hectic and stressful time, I darted into a grocery store for a 'quick stop' and bumped into a friend. She looked stressed so I asked her what was wrong. Immediately, she began venting about the current state of affairs and an argument she just had with her husband. I listened, but soon realized that I was [...]

Posted in Emotional Intelligence, How to Build Empathy

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