When a parent thinks of avoiding power struggles with children, empathy may not be at the top of their list. It is an underutilized response that few parents use when in conflict with their children and teens.

Sometimes I get wildly angry at screens—whether an Xbox or TV—and my children’s inability to end their session the second I ask them. If I wasn't so frugally and environmentally driven, I might be tempted to throw screens out of moving vehicles and second story windows.

Internet Addiction, Texting Addiction, Screen Addiction, and Online Gaming Addiction are all phrases we hear in modern times but are they really a thing? Well, yes they are, and no they are not. What?! Keep on reading to see why this is not a clear-cut answer.

First off, let’s talk aboutdopaminebecause it currently has a lot of media attention due to its association with possible screen and gaming addiction.

Estimated reading time: 6 minutes

Why have selfies become a trend? And dowe take a selfie only when we look our best? I was shocked recently to hear that teenage girls can take up to one hundred selfies just to capture the perfect one for posting. We probably don't take a picture during a fight with your spouse or after a long day of power struggles with your toddler or teen. 

Could the preoccupation with Facebook along with snapping selfies and posting pictures on Snapchat be a sign of how invisible we feel to ourselves? Maybe, maybe not. But there is a form of invisibility to ourselves that often goes unnoticed—a lack of [...]

The term "social media" did not even exist in mainstream culture when I had my first son in 2004. My mother and I still wrote snail-mail and email letters back and forth and talked on the phone. That is how I kept in contact with all my out-of-town loved ones, and as for my in-town peeps, it was face-to-face get-togethers and phone calls with occasional emails to coordinate plans that involved more than a few of us.Going back a bit further, the social currency for young people in my era was notes written during class and passed in the halls, phone calls, and chat gatherings in the corners of [...]

There is endless content online (ironic isn’t it!?!) about screens, internet use, gaming, safety, addiction, sleep deprivation, and how to set limits. So much content that a person (ME!) can spend hours on a screen just learning about how to deal with screens, so why write more?

At Heartmanity, we want to approach screens, tech, safety, limits, and the like through the understanding of emotional needs, relationships, empathy, compassion, brain science, and love, which are not common approaches used in most available content. So, that being said, let’s look at why teens love screens so much.

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Parenting is an elaborate and complex job that changes with each age as a child develops. Since our primary responsibility is to keep our children safe while providing a stable home, it’s understandable how involved—even overprotective—parents can become. However, the older a child gets, the less control we have as parents. Therefore, the need for children and teens to build strong self-reliance and emotional intelligence is critical. Does helicopter parenting encourage independence and resiliency?

Estimated reading time: 6.5 minutes

Let's face it; life can tire a person out! When you add up the jobs, romance (or lack of romance), friendship, parenting, being someone’s adult child yourself, self-care, sleeping, eating, exercising, being “tired out” can just grow and grow.

For many of us, the more we take on, the more stressed and tired we become. To compensate for the overwhelming feelings of being more and more out of control, we try to do even more. This tactic is a futile attempt to give ourselves and others the illusion that we “have it all together.” However, maybe we should release that illusion of control.

A vital path of mindful parenting is to parent with the end in mind. Visionary parenting is another way of describing this mindset. Discipline, love, structure, boundaries, empathy, and redirecting children’s behavior all contribute to helping a human grow up to be an adult. Children are not just a toddlers, preschoolers, middle schoolers, or teens. 

When we parent, especially in the toughest moments of discomfort, challenge, and testing, we need to remember that we are parenting not only the 3-year-old child in front of us but also the 13-year-old teen to be, or the 23-year-old young adult [...]

You put the oxygen mask on yourself before others.

We hear that lesson reiterated often by airlines. But in practice—when a parent thinks their child needs help—what is their gut instinct?

Self-care for parents is a challenging issue, and yet parents need self-care to be their best self. Balancing work and home life with a career, socializing, financial issues, a marriage or relationship, and raising kids makes being a parent a difficult juggling act.

How can parents find time for their own wellness amidst the hustle?

Estimated reading time: 3 minutes

Every parent is unique; every child is unique. All parents love their children, and all children love their parents—no matter how imperfectly.

But do we truly take stock as parents of how we are imprinting our children through our daily interactions? Are we deliberately teaching them emotional intelligence skills to be resilient when life knocks them around? Or are we too overwhelmed with our lives and families?

Estimated reading time: 4 minutes